As I am studying relational psychology in university specializing in relationship issues, I have been researching this particular pattern that many millennials specifically have been engaging in; lower standards when it comes to their relationships.
Real quick, here are three standards all of us women should be reminded of:
#1: No still means no.
Remember when the movie ” Think like a man Act like a woman” came out, and everyone was talking about that 90-day rule? How many of you actually waited 90 days to sleep with someone after that or since? The truth is, us many millennials live in a fast paced environment; we rush everything, from finishing school to getting a career to cooking and including relationships. I challenge you to wait even longer than the 90-day rule if you want to and not think that he will leave if you decide to. Remember, no still means no and having a man who just wants to taste that cookie isn’t one you should say yes to.
#2: Cellphones off.
I cannot stress this enough!! It is one of my pet peeves to see a gorgeous woman at a beautiful romantic dinner table under dimmed lights trying to engage with a man that loves his cell more than his girlfriend/wife. I absolutely HATE it!
I’m going to remind you ladies that you deserve a man who cannot take his eyes off of you.
May you realize that you are worthy enough to have a man that loves you more than an electronic device. I remember once, going on a coffee date with whom I thought was sooooo handsome. Once there, all he did was text at the same time we talked, and so I got up and left. He tried calling me for days; writing me a message saying something like no women has ever walked out on him for being on his cellphone all the time and that he did not understand the big deal. The big deal was: I am a big deal. The woman that I am is a big deal. And darling so are you. Never give the right to a man to look at his phone more than you. If he does, I hope you know you are better off looking for another man.
#3. The rebirth of Chivalry
Respect and politeness go a long way. As women, I think we can all agree that it is the little things that matter the most. Be woman enough to ask for those things; let a man treat you like the queen you truly are. My entire perspective on men changed when I insisted that for me, and that is a personal choice of course!
I appreciated a man that comes to my door and knocks, open the car door and closes it behind me. I appreciate a man that pulls my chair out and pours me a glass of wine or champagne before pouring his own glass. The day I asked for the level of respect I knew I was worthy of is the day I started to attract only respectable men. Since then my perspective on men is only positive.
People thought I was absolutely crazy for asking all those “high” demands! But when they saw the lifestyle, I was living by the gesture of a gentleman they knew they were crazy not to ask for those gestures at all. Many do not ask for they are convinced that chivalry is dead. Ladies, ask, and you shall receive. Don’t ask and you shall be deceived. Don’t be afraid to let your man know you would appreciate those small gestures. If he loves you, he will step up his game up real quick. And if he doesn’t please…don’t let him score.
With Love and Gratitude,