Hey you! My name is Ana Stubbs and I’m here to talk about something that has completely transformed my life, yes my life! And what is that? Well the fact that I truly am capable of being who I wanna be and live out my truest potential no matter how much others and myself think I can’t. It all started when I was a kid, I grew up in a less than ideal environment, where I was abused emotionally for a very long time, which caused me to fall into a depression that made me feel like it would be better if I just died, I had a very negative self image and didn’t know what self love was, I had always felt like a huge part of me was missing, maybe it was a loving parent, or the void of never knowing my biological father. However there was so much I didn’t understand and I didn’t know who to turn to for guidance, I went to churches and talked to different people but nothing helped and I felt like no one even cared about me, that was until I met the guy who is now my husband, we got married soon, I was 16 and he was 18, and we had our first a year later, I went into depression again but no one knew and because of ignorance I didn’t know why I was struggling, the hardest thing was I got pregnant again when my baby was 6 months old, things got so bad with my emotional state that because of it I have very few memories of my second, marriage was very hard as you can imagine with two immature kids now trying to raise 2 babies, and pretty much still kids ourselves, neither of us could even legally drive yet lol. But then came the worst part, because of all my emotional baggage from childhood trauma I really gave those around me a very hard time, especially my husband, and still I was stuck. It was after about a couple years that I sadly had 2 miscarriages and that’s the drop that spilt the cup for me, I totally lost it, I remember thinking to myself, well I’m ugly, no one loves me and now I can’t even do the one thing a woman should be able to do, I was in so much pain at this point that I just stopped caring, and I started drinking a lot, when my husband noticed it was almost too late, I was at a point that I didn’t even know what I wanted for my life but somehow I couldn’t let go because of a voice in my head that said “this is the man your gonna marry”, I’ll never forget that and I’ll always be forever grateful for it, I heard it when I saw him and it was like a blindfold fell off my eyes, somehow that was what kept me together and gave me the strength to not quit. My husband gave me an ultimatum he said if I didn’t change my mentality and became the beautiful woman he knew I was then he would have no choice but to leave and he would take my kids with him cause at that point I was doing a terrible job at mothering. This hit me so hard, and I knew he was right, so I set on a path to healing and understanding myself and to figure out why I had all these problems, why had I become such a terrible person so much to the point that I let myself get to where I could lose my whole family, the one thing that kept me living was seeing how my little girls loved me so much and the thought of them growing up without me scared the sh*** out of me, so I fought hard for over the course of 2 years, and I discovered who I was and what was causing me so much pain.
Once I knew who I was and the cause of my issues I slowly but surely worked on healing them, and every step of the way my husband was there to help me and support me but most of all love me in the process, in spite of so many people telling him to just give up on me, that I was hopeless but he never let me hear it, it was seriously the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my entire life. But guess what!! I rose from the fire like a Fenix.! And I became the best version of me and I love myself and I know I am enough and I know I deserve the best no matter how many mistakes I’ve made, I know mistakes are part of the process of growing.
And you need to know that to.!
The best version of you is only 1 foot away.! It’s In the way you think of yourself and how much work you are willing to invest in yourself to become that incredible badass sexy woman that ever walked this planet.!
There’s only one you!
Embrace you and be you to the fullest!
Love ~ Ana Stubbs